Being a role model: an archived Project Mindset post, originally published in 2022. Dates and roles reflect the original publication.
Episode 86: Be the Person You Want Your Child to Become
Why setting an example matters more than talking: parenting, health and happiness for 2023.
Being a role model
Being a role model means more than giving advice. In the final Project Mindset episode of 2022, Reza reflects on a major lesson: children notice what you do. He deliberately exercises at home so his five-and-a-half-year-old son sees movement as normal. He also shares his advice for 2023: collect genuine moments with other people.
Summary
In one sentence: Children take their lead from the life their parents demonstrate, rather than words alone.
Short summary: Reza wants to know two things about his children: are they healthy and happy? His main parenting lesson in 2022 was that example matters more than explanation, so he trains at home where his son can see it. He closes the year by encouraging people to collect meaningful moments together.
Detailed summary: Reza’s central lesson is to be the person he hopes his child becomes. His son watches how he behaves, eats, speaks and faces challenges. Training at home lets his son see and join in. Health and happiness form Reza’s foundation for a fulfilling life. For 2023, he recommends seeking real connections and shared moments.
Context
Who: Reza Mehman, Project Mindset host and father of children aged five-and-a-half and one-and-a-half at the recording.
What: How parental behaviour influences children, and the life philosophy he draws from fatherhood.
Why: Parenting and example matter to families; the episode offers a practical personal perspective.
Three questions: how can I support healthy, happy children? Why is demonstrating stronger than explaining? Which moments remain in memory at year-end?
Contents
Introduction; summary; context; themes; key takeaways; FAQ; quotes; full transcript; keywords; names and terms; passage to share.
Themes
Example in parenting
Children learn by observing. Parental example can influence them more than lectures. Keywords: parenting, observation, leading by example.
Health and movement as family values
Reza trains at home to make exercise visible and encourage participation. Keywords: family exercise, healthy habits, movement.
Health and happiness as foundations
For him these outweigh material and career concerns. Keywords: happiness, health, fulfilling life.
Connections and moments
Shared experiences remain memorable beyond completed tasks. Keywords: connection, genuine moments, relationships.
Reflection and gratitude
He reviews 2022, thanks listeners and offers a suggestion for 2023. Keywords: year-end reflection, gratitude, new year.
Key takeaways
- Children watch how parents eat, speak and treat people.
- Be the person you want your child to become was a major 2022 lesson.
- Health and happiness form his foundation for a good life.
- Words need to be supported by example.
- Exercising at home makes movement visible.
- His son joins in with push-ups, burpees and squats.
- Shared moments outlast memories of finished tasks.
- For 2023, collect genuine connections.
- Different mindset tools work for different people.
- Gratitude to the community matters to him.
Frequently asked questions
What does the title mean?
Try to model the qualities you hope your child develops. Children notice behaviour more than words alone.
Why train at home?
So his son sees exercise as normal. Watching push-ups and burpees can be more motivating than hearing advice.
What two questions matter most?
Are you healthy? Are you happy? These form his foundation for a fulfilling life.
What is his 2023 advice?
Collect genuine moments with family, friends and new people. Those connections stay with us.
What was his biggest lesson in 2022?
Leading by example matters more than talking. Children constantly observe their parents.
Why prioritise health and happiness over money?
For Reza they support everything else; without them, material things lose value.
Which guests does he mention?
Jacob Fatih and Torch, among others.
Memorable quotes — translated
I can talk as much as I like; he pays far more attention to how I behave.
Be the person you want your child to become.
He watches me constantly: how I eat, speak to his sister and speak to his mother.
If I do not behave in the way I hope for my children, it will not happen.
What stays in your mind is the moments you have with other people.
Instead of seeing me leave with a backpack and return two hours later, he sees Dad doing push-ups, burpees and squats.
Until then, remember: mindset is everything.
Full transcript
Hi everyone, and welcome to Project Mindset, the channel for everyone who knows that with the right mindset anything is possible. My children are now five-and-a-half and one-and-a-half. One day they will move out, and we will not see each other as often. When that happens, whether we meet irregularly or, hopefully, regularly, or speak on the phone, there are two things I want to know.
I already know what they are: are you healthy, and are you happy? Those are the most important things for me. Of course there are other subjects and challenges, including finances. But I believe happiness and health are the foundation of a contented life. I already wonder what I can do so that, when we eventually speak, my children can tell me they are healthy and happy.
What I want to teach my children
I think about that a lot. I talk with my older child about why good food, exercise, upbringing and education matter. But one thing has become completely clear: I can talk as much as I like; he pays more attention to my behaviour.
At dinner, for example, he watches how I eat, how I speak to his sister, to his mother — my wife — to my mother when she visits, my father and my mother-in-law. He notices everything about how I behave.
That has become very apparent recently, so I changed how I exercise. I train at home more often. Not because I particularly enjoy training in a small space, but because I think it is good for him to see. He does judo and football, and I do not want merely to talk about movement; I want him to see that I am active too.
Making movement visible at home
Instead of seeing me leave with a backpack and come back two hours later, he sees Dad doing push-ups, burpees and squats. That encourages him so much that he automatically joins in whenever he sees me exercising at home. We play around too: he typically climbs on my back, and we tease each other.
That is what matters to me: being and living an example. I can talk to my children as much as I want. If I do not behave in the way I wish for them, it will not happen.
There is a great quote behind today’s subject: be the person you want your child to become. It was a major lesson for me in 2022. If I want my child to develop health, happiness and good behaviour and understand what matters, first I need to understand it myself.
Two insights at the end of the year
Second, I need to demonstrate how it works. Today is intentionally short. It is 31 December 2022, the last day of the year. I have learned a lot, and the year rushed past. But some things stayed with me, especially moments with other people: connections and conversations with family, strangers and new podcast guests.
There were wonderful conversations. Jacob Fatih is an incredibly warm person; listen to that episode. Torch and others too. At year-end, I notice that completed tasks and smaller challenges fade. What remains is the exchange and connection with other people.
If I may offer advice for next year — you certainly do not have to take it — that would be it.
Collect genuine moments
For 2023, collect those moments: exchanges with people and connections with new people. Those things remain.
Thank you for being here, listening and giving feedback. It makes me very happy to know that people listen when I speak. I already talk my children’s ears off! It feels good to discuss my mindset tools and approaches with others too.
I always stress that these are things that work for me. They do not automatically work for everyone. I am also delighted when people share their tools and techniques with me.
Thank you for staying with me, and I hope you continue. I wish you a wonderful, successful, healthy and happy 2023 — all the best. I hope we keep hearing and seeing one another for a long time.
That is it for today and for 2022. We will speak next year. Until then, remember: mindset is everything.
The source transcript was automatically generated with Whisper AI and may contain occasional errors. Clear errors and names have been smoothed in translation.
Keywords
Role model for children, parenting mindset, leading by example, health and happiness, exercising with children, Project Mindset, Reza Mehman, 2022 reflection, personal development, parental example, human connection.
Names and terms
Reza Mehman, Project Mindset, Jacob Fatih, Torch, push-ups, burpees, squats, judo, mindset, happiness, role modelling, parenting, New Year’s Eve 2022.
Passage to share
Be the person you want your child to become. Children constantly watch how parents behave, eat, speak and face challenges. Words alone cannot replace example. For Reza, health and happiness form the foundation of a fulfilling life, and shared moments are what remain at year-end.
More in the Project Mindset archive (German) and the Reza Mehman Podcast.
