25. Dealing with a negative environment

Hi everyone and welcome to Project Mindset. This channel is for all those who know that with the right mindset, anything is possible in life. Today we have a very short Project Mindset episode. It’s about dealing with a negative environment. I came up with this topic because I listened to the interview from episode 20 again. I had the opportunity to interview the professional golfer Moritz Lampert. It was super interesting. I highly recommend everyone check it out.

But one key sentence has definitely stuck with me. He said that in the current pandemic situation, it’s not about who the best golfer is, but about who can best handle the situation. Let me briefly recount this scene. During the pandemic we’re in, I had a very, very difficult time last year because so many tournaments were canceled. There was no certainty about when we’d be able to play again, what the situation would be like, or anything like that.

And I let myself get totally intimidated by it. I didn’t really want to go away. Staying home felt more appealing. I wanted to be safe. But that’s just not possible anymore. Last year, I think it was new for all of us. And now this year, it’s about who handles this situation best. And the situation is, the tournaments could be canceled. We’re staying in a kind of bubble where we’re tested and then not allowed to leave at all, except for the golf course, the hotel, and the hotel meals. We’re tested regularly.

Dealing with difficult circumstances

These are all unpleasant things. But the person who can handle them best will also perform best. What he said was super exciting and interesting. So, as I said, he’ll definitely listen to it again. But what I find particularly good is that the core of his statement is practically applicable to all areas of life. We all go through phases of, let’s say, a down phase, a difficult phase, or where certain external circumstances have an extreme impact on our happiness.

It doesn’t have to be anything major like a pandemic; it could be something like your job making you unhappy, a conflict at work, or some minor issues in important relationships. Maybe you’re having some problems in your friendships. There could be many different things affecting my current situation, my current happiness. And I would always try—and this is what I want to talk about today—to consciously take steps to cope with the situation.

The hedgehog principle for maintaining your own focus

So, I don’t think there’s one single key to success, how to cope with all negative situations. But what I find really helpful is that whenever you notice something is having a really negative impact on you, you should—I’ve talked about this before, I call it the Hedgehog Principle—essentially, you extend your spines, make yourself small, and focus on your own important things. That means heads down, get back to work. What I mean by that is, I’m using a bit of an analogy with the hedgehog that occasionally runs around in my garden.

And I notice he couldn’t care less about what’s going on around him. He’s simply focused on his own thing. And I find that admirable, because I actually think many people are like that—I include myself in that group—in that I often let myself be guided by external circumstances. I’ve often caught myself doing that, especially now during the pandemic, reading the news too often, checking the infection rates too frequently, seeing what the current situation is.

Pursuing one’s own goals despite external pressures

I actually have virtually no influence on what’s happening right now. And I let this negativity get to me too much. But what I’ve noticed is that the more I focus on myself, on my own important issues, the better I feel. What also shouldn’t happen during such a negative phase is putting off projects or certain issues that are important to you, saying, “Hey, only when this difficult phase of my life is over will I start on the new issue that’s important to me,” or “Only then will I do something for my health again, only then will I start exercising again.”

No, the important thing is to work on the things that matter most, despite or even because of this negative environment. For example, whether it’s sports, health issues, or mindset-related topics. I would never, for instance, start saying, just because I’m under a lot of stress, “No, now I’m going to stop meditating, now I’m going to stop exercising; I need to deal with the stress first.” I think it’s actually—and this might sound very selfish—but ultimately, it’s about taking care of yourself first so you can help others.

Create positive areas in your own life

What I also find extremely important, especially during times when everything around you is so negative, is to create your own positive spaces. That means looking for areas of life, friendships, and relationships that you immediately associate with positive things. For example, I have a mindset group that we started a few months ago (greetings to everyone!), where we meet regularly to exchange ideas and discuss, let’s say, various topics.

Of course, not all of them are positive, but overall, I associate this mindset group with extremely positive memories and extremely positive thoughts. And that’s what I mean by creating spaces where positivity is absolutely paramount. Or when I firmly intend, for example, to have quality time with my loved ones, with my family, with my child, and so on. I make a very strong intention of having a positive time with them. What happens at the end of the day? If I intend something positive, something positive usually comes out of it.

There are certainly many more tricks, and I think the list is incredibly long, but what I definitely want to tell you today is that, yes, difficult phases in life come again and again. And as Morris Lampert already said, what really matters in life is being able to cope with these difficult phases. There’s never a perfect phase where everything goes smoothly. So, for example, people who are currently considering linking their family planning to the pandemic, I think that’s the wrong approach.

Don’t wait for perfect conditions

So, I also spent a lot of time thinking about when I should actually start a family. When do I want to have children? How do I even go about it? I would basically never make it dependent on external circumstances. There’s never a perfect situation. I would simply follow my feelings, what I’m feeling at the time, naturally in consultation with a partner. Another very small example is that I also spent a lot of time thinking about when I should start investing in stocks.

When should I invest in stocks? Are they too high right now? Are they too low? I need to do something for my retirement, and so on. Of course, there is a perfect entry point, but nobody knows when that point will be. When it comes to saving, the rule is: the earlier you start, the better. And then there’s the question of when to start a new skillset. When do I want to learn something new again? Why should I tie that to the pandemic when I start something new?

Why I started the podcast anyway

I have a very specific example from my own life. Before the pandemic started, in March of last year, I had actually planned to start a podcast and told myself, okay, now I’m going to go for it. Then the pandemic happened, and at first I thought, okay, I’ll put everything on hold. I’ll start my podcast when it’s over. But then, when I realized, hey, it’s completely impossible to predict when the pandemic will end, I decided, okay, I’m going to do the things that are important to me now, and podcasting was a real passion project for me, so I’m just going to do it now.

I have absolutely no control over what happened around me. Things change, the pandemic is over, something else comes along, and I use this excuse again and then don’t start the podcast. Okay, folks, as I said, this is a relatively short episode. I think it’s incredibly important to understand that negative phases and negative environments will always come back in life, and that you become independent of them, independent of what’s happening around you, and that you focus entirely on what’s good for you and how you can move forward personally in life.

Sharing thoughts and experiences

Alright everyone, I hope you enjoyed the content. If you liked at least one thing, please give it a like, subscribe to the channel, and tell your friends and acquaintances about it, because that’s the only way the channel can grow. If you have any questions or feedback, just write to me at hallo@projectmindset.de. I’ll be in touch again soon; I always love hearing your feedback and am extremely happy to receive it. Just write to me, and yeah, have a great day, see you next week, and don’t forget, my set is everything.