110. Mindset Moment 04: Do you! Meeting someone completely authentically leaves the biggest impression.

Hi everyone and welcome to Project Mindset. This channel is for all those who know that with the right mindset, anything is possible. I was recently invited to a pretty amazing dinner show. A huge shoutout to Martin Schaf, the restaurateur at Heidelberg Castle. He invited me to one of his dinner shows. It was a tribute show to the singer Tina Turner. There was an artist who impersonated Tina Turner, and the dinner was absolutely delicious.

Like I said, huge shoutout, thanks again Martin for the invitation. At this dinner show, as I mentioned, there was this performer, and she was absolutely fantastic. Not only did she look incredibly like Tina Turner, but her voice, movements, dancing—everything—was spot on. It was almost a perfect replica, the way she presented it, and I was truly impressed. Especially her voice. I have to say, I’m not a huge Tina Turner fan, but she did a really great job with the well-known songs, like “Simply the Best” and “Golden Eye,” and so on.

Your own talent instead of someone else’s role model

In this context, I thought to myself, wow, that singer really sings well, can dance well too, her voice was amazing, and so on and so forth. Why didn’t this singer actually do her own thing and try to launch her own career? Maybe she did, I don’t know, but why did she ultimately stick to imitating, copying, Tina Turner? I mean that in a positive sense, really copying her very well. But why didn’t she manage to make a career with her own voice?

There could be a thousand reasons for it, of course. Maybe her own songs don’t sound that good, maybe she had the wrong management—there could be a great many reasons. But what came to mind is that there’s definitely one reason, at least in my opinion. And that is that in this case—and I really don’t mean this in a bad way—she’s simply copying someone else. It’s clear to me that you can’t become more famous than the actual main artist if you do that.

Why Copying Has Limits

And I think that’s really the main problem: if you try to imitate someone, to copy someone, then I simply don’t believe that you can be successful in any way in the long run. Especially in fields where it depends so heavily on the individual, like with artists, musicians, designers, and so on, where someone has to present their own image to the outside world so that they stay in people’s minds, where someone really has to showcase their art so that people understand, “Ah, this is totally authentic, this is the artist I like, the one I enjoy listening to, the one I look up to,” or whatever.

And I think it’s extremely important to simply be yourself if you want to perform in this context. This reminds me so much of my podcast with the journalist and podcaster Frank Joung. It was episode 56. I definitely recommend giving it a listen. He said something very relevant to today’s topic. He asked me, back then, when I asked my classic mindset question at the end: “Which mindset has had the biggest and most positive impact on your life?”

Frank Joungs Mindset: Do You

He said, “do you,” meaning be yourself. He considers that the most important mindset for himself. But I’ll just play the podcast episode here briefly. Then I can maybe get back to what I mean by how the podcast and the whole thing reinforced my mindset, which I had before but which I don’t think I could articulate quite so well. And that is, I always find this English term quite good for it, which is “do you.” So not just be yourself, but also try to find out who you are, so to speak, or what makes you who you are.

So, when people constantly look at why Tom Hanks is so successful, or why so-and-so is so popular, and then say, “Yeah, I want to do exactly what they do,” that just doesn’t work. You can always learn from others, but I think it’s much more important to look at your own strengths and weaknesses and honestly evaluate them. That’s not as easy as it sounds. You first have to figure out what you’re good at and what you actually want to do.

Take your own passion seriously

I always say, when someone starts a podcast, what do you want to do? What are you passionate about, and what are you really excited about? Because if you’re really passionate about it, there’s a good chance you’ll dedicate a lot of time and energy to it. If you’re doing it for fun, out of sheer enjoyment, then you’ll get better at what you’re doing. And when you get better, things progress. And then to say, “Yeah, I have to start a podcast now, just because everyone else is doing it,” is a different story.

Continued

Or I feel I have to become an actor somehow, so I’m as popular as someone else, so I get the same kind of love and recognition. That usually doesn’t work out that way. Or you just don’t find happiness that way. There are also many people who have achieved what they wanted and realize it wasn’t for them. Instead, I think it’s really important to look at what you’re good at. Because you’re successful because of your strengths. And you can also fail because of those same strengths, which in turn can somehow become weaknesses.

You know what I mean? There are always two sides to every coin. Some people say, “Wow, he’s so temperamental, he’s so energetic, he’s so lively.” And you can say about the exact same person, “Ugh, so annoying, so loud, so attention-seeking.” It’s basically the same skill, just two different sides. Perspectives, yeah. Exactly. And I think you have to try to balance that and see where your strengths lie. And I’ve discovered with myself, with the podcast—you know, you always think at the beginning, “I can’t speak very well, I’m not a trained radio presenter.”

Doubts and a focus on shortcomings

What if people say you ask stupid questions or that your technique isn’t right, because you’re not a techie? And you’re always thinking about what you can’t do. And honestly, all that feedback and what people say reinforces that perception. Because especially in Germany, it’s very deficit-oriented. People always focus on what you can’t do, instead of building on what you can. And the rest, yeah, okay, you’ll figure that out, you’ll learn it somehow.

But that’s your standout feature, you’re really good at that. This empowering aspect. Keep working on that, because you can build something from it. And I’ve noticed for myself, this empathy, this listening, this ability, I think, to get along with everyone. And also, how should I put it, I believe that I can somehow ask questions in a way that’s accessible to as many people as possible, through my job, through being a journalist.

Finding your own way of speaking

I’m not trying to talk in a totally highfalutin way. I’m not trying to do all sorts of buddy-buddy stuff all the time. Like, inside jokes, haha, we both get it, but the others don’t. So, maintaining a balance. That’s why I kept it open to everyone. I didn’t want to do some kind of migrant thing. Like, hey, come on, let’s rant about white Germans. You too, me too, yeah. Instead, it should be something where everyone benefits. And yeah, so, like I said, I think I need to summarize it again, I think it’s important to be self-confident enough to say, okay, I have this strength, and I know it, and that’s okay.

This isn’t arrogance, and it isn’t conceit; it’s an honest self-assessment. I still have work to do. I don’t have a natural talent for that; I really need to work on it. But what defines me, what makes me successful, that strength—I can stand by that. I would empower everyone to do the same. And not like, “Oh yeah, then it’ll just seem conceited.” That’s the vibe we always get in Germany.

Honestly acknowledge strengths

And no, don’t say it, don’t say that, then others will think something’s wrong. No, but I think it’s really good and important to realize for yourself, “I can do that too.” And even if 100 people say, “No, you can’t,” well, yes, I believe I can. And yes, I think that’s important. So, try to get to the core of who you are, and do it your way. Then it can work out, no matter what you’re planning. So I’m definitely taking that away from me. You, you, and me.

I immediately secured the domain in parallel. Just kidding. So, Frank, thank you so much for those inspiring closing words. If I could give you just one mindset tool today, it would be this: do you. Don’t copy anyone, maybe take a look at the good things, but at your core, present yourself as you truly are. In my opinion, being completely authentic makes the biggest impression. With that in mind, thank you for listening. We’ll talk again soon. Until then, remember, mindset is everything.